Costa Rica Tainted Alcohol–Setting the Record Straight

Written by Michael Simons on . Posted in Costa Rica Living, Guanacaste Tourism, Newsletters, Vacation in Costa Rica

The recent reports about Costa Rica tainted alcohol make me think of the Guns N’ Roses song “Night Train”.  Every time I hear Guns N’ Roses, I get fired up. They wrote some incredible songs that will last forever. One of the most popular drinking songs was called Night Train, named after the cheap wine Night Train Express. “Loaded like a Freight Train; Flyin’ like an Aeroplane”; Classic Rock N Roll about rotgut booze. Unfortunately, Costa Rica had its own version of this recently, and it did not end well.

Two weeks ago, 19 people died drinking Costa Rica tainted alcohol that was contaminated with the chemical methanol.  With the recent deaths of USA citizens in the Dominican Republic, as well as Mexico, the media was quick to jump all over this story, and capitalize on the fear. As happens a lot in the media, they got it wrong. They said that tourists had died, and one news outlet even went on record and called Costa Rica “A Caribbean Island.” Anyone who has access to Google Maps, knows that we are not an island and we are not in the Caribbean. We are a Central American country, and not one tourist died. I am here to set the record straight.

Costa Rica tainted alcohol

The deaths occurred, in places where no tourist would ever go. They were inner city areas, near the capital of San Jose, and the alcohol were of the lowest caliber: Guaro Montano; Guaro Gran Apache; Aguardiente Estrella; Aguardiente Baron Roja; Aguardiente Timbuka and Molotov Aguardiente.

People, I live at the beach in a town called Playas del Coco. This is a drinking town with a fishing problem. We drink our faces off every single day. We consume more alcohol than most anywhere, except for places like Bourbon Street, and I have never even HEARD of these particular brands. This is the stuff GNR sang about. These are the Night Train, Thunderbird and Mad Dog 20/20 of Costa Rica. It is literally, one step up from Moon shine. This is the stuff bums drink, and you will never find these in any reputable bar, restaurant or resort in Costa Rica.

Relax; everything is fine; you can continue with your vacation plans for paradise.

The government confiscated 30,000 bottles of these brands of Costa Rica tainted alcohol, and have basically removed them from circulation.

So, book your ticket, and have a great time; drink and be merry and enjoy the amazing sites that this phenomenal country has to offer. If you travel to remote areas, and decide to walk into a local bar, stick to brands you are familiar with. When all else fails, drink a Pilsen. I have traveled a lot in my life, and the best cities I have ever visited, always included alcohol. You are safe. Costa Rica is beautiful. Come on down baby, and have a cocktail or two.

“Got a drink in my hand, and my toes in the sand…..”

See you soon, Michael.

By the way, Costa Rica is on an Isthmus.

isthmus:

(ismes)

NOUN

  1. a narrow strip of land with sea on either side, forming a link between two larger areas of land.

Tank Tops flip Flops Newsletter edition no. 136

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Comments (15)

  • Andrew Robart

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    Loved it Michael!!! I especially liked the arrow pointing to Costa Rica so those media gurus can find it before they write the next travel article!!!

    Reply

  • Anne Lairmore

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    Very well written! Thanks for setting the record straight!

    Reply

  • Kevin sommer

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    Great article my friend.

    Reply

  • Chris P. Griesbach

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    Thanks Mike for the explanation. I had already packed my booze for the next trip. Now I can relax and look forward to drinking my flor de Cana in paradise.

    Reply

  • Bob Tritten

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    Hey Michael, Loved your words. Loved every minute I spent in Paradise and enjoyed every brain cell I left there. Been planning my next visit for a while, now, but haven’t given up. CR will always be a very bright spot. Anyway, Don’t ya just love sticking it to the press!!! Bob

    Reply

  • KQ

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    I’m looking forward to having a fishing problem!! Thanks for settin’ things right!

    Reply

  • Joan

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    Well said Michael

    Reply

  • Allan Wyatt

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    Thanks for the entertaining enlightenment. Some of my Facebook friends had researched this misreporting and set the record straight a few weeks ago. Somehow I haven’t been receiving you blog, but when I do ( like today), I really enjoy it. And I’m stealing the “fishing problem” line!

    Reply

  • Greg obert

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    The press can’t even island/isthmus right how can they believe they can get politics right??

    Reply

  • Gerry Mosby

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    Hilarious descriptor of Coco, Mike. I larfed out loud. Still am. Good on ya for setting the records straight, about both that deadly rotgut and a “drinking town with a fishing problem”.

    Reply

  • Holly Reef

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    So tired of fake news! You go baby! Great assessment! XO

    Reply

  • Tim OLeary

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    I grow tiresome of the fake news. Everyone that gets your newsletter appreciates your candor in this matter. Don’t stop talking about anything that comes to mind. Especially when the truth is involved!

    Reply

  • Bethany Kirk

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    Awesome blog, Michael! I just shared it on our Facebook page, Estelar Spanish School in Costa Rica.

    Reply

  • Toni

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    Hey Michael. Great article. At least you had the facts straight. I wouldn’t drink any of the Quaro. Your right just for the bums. Oh I can’t wait till I return to that Caribbean Island lol. Guess those folks who wrote article haven’t traveled any. Lol.

    Reply

  • Butch

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    Great article Mike. Coming down to Coco the last several years. I believe I know exactly who you are and have been invited to your yearly party. Costa Rica is Awesome. It is safe and we especially love Coco. We have two condos there now and can’t wait to spend more time there very soon. Costa Rica is very safe.

    Reply

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