Moving to Costa Rica

Written by Michael Simons on . Posted in Costa Rica Charity, Costa Rica Living, EX PATS in Costa Rica, Investing in Costa Rica, Newsletters, Residency

Moving to Costa Rica


Just recently, we sold my buddy’s townhome. I was the listing broker and another associate brought the offer. The buyer felt, that since it was a 12 year old property, the air conditioning units were dated and probably needed to be replaced. He asked for a $10,000 credit from my seller, to offset the cost of installing new units. It turns out that my friend had already replaced most of the condensers, and was going to send me the receipts to show to the buyer’s agent. When he spoke with his wife about it, she told him to just “split it” and get the unit sold, as she was excited to have it closed. You see they had a bigger and better property in mind, and needed to sell this first, before making an offer on the other one. She did not want to lose this other house.

I think she feels like money grows on trees, he said to me, and I feel like I am getting hustled.

A couple days later we do the inventory. After they had signed off on it, his wife changed her mind. There were some kitchen and closet organizers that she felt would go great in their future home, and asked her husband to see if we could have them excluded.
“So let me get this straight. You were willing to just give this guy $5000, but you want me to tell Simons that we might blow this deal up over $20 plastic tubs?”


I have literally seen two ladies, practically come to blows, over a $50 kitchen matt, as it was not on the list.

It is PRINCIPLE she demanded. But I WANT it, the other one screamed.

“I will buy everyone a new rug, as a housewarming gift!” as I stepped between them like a referee in a Championship Boxing Match.

Oh the difference between Men and Women.  Of course if the argument was over the well used BBQ out on the terrace then watch out….  

Tank Tops Flip Flops Newsletter edition no. 151

After my last newsletter, I had about 250 replies, thanking me for the update. It was so uplifting to see how many people were inspired by my article, giving them hope in such desperate times. I had one woman though, who wrote to me, who thought my message was only serving my business purpose. After a few email exchanges we seem to be back on the same page. First off, let me make this clear. I sell real estate; and I do it in Costa Rica. So I would be lying to you if I told you that my newsletters were not a way to drive my career, of course it is. But that does not mean that I am not sympathetic to the horrible situation so many people are going through, here in Costa Rica and the rest of the planet. But what I hope she finally realized, is that my job is not to deliver shitty news to people around the world, that is what CNN (Constantly Negative News) is for. I am here to give people a light at the end of the tunnel; to put a smile on their face with my twisted views on paradise; and to help them, if they are interested, in finding a way to join me. They are not forced to read my stories, they can delete it; and nobody is putting a gun to their head, and a checkbook in their hand; making them buy a property. The fact that I LOVE living here, and that I’m so glad that I am not in North America right now, is not something I am going to hide. You could not pay me enough money to be there, instead of here.

A friend of mine who lives here in Costa Rica, posted this on his Facebook. It was from a CTV publication. “It seems that the government of Canada will loan an individual up to $5000 for a plane ticket home, if they do not have the money. It seems there are many people trapped abroad in countries like India, Peru, Spain, Honduras, Ecuador, El Salvador and Guatemala. Costa Rica was not mentioned.”

OF COURSE NOT. Nobody feels stranded here. As a matter of fact, I know of a couple hundred people who purposely STAYED here when they had the chance to go home. I know of dozens others, who jumped on one of the last flights to get here, so that they could ride out the virus in our little Eden, instead of freezing cold Canada or virus infested USA cities. In between paragraphs, I am dipping in and out of my pool; I currently have a margarita in my hand; and it is 90 degrees F. Now you tell me; is that how you are riding this thing out?

My phone has not stopped ringing for 2 weeks: I literally have to re charge it a couple times a day. I am receiving over 150 emails each morning in my inbox, many from individuals I have not spoken to, or heard from in years. These people are not just inquiring about buying a vacation property, or an investment condo, but they are writing to me about MOVING to Costa Rica! I got a message the other day, from a couple I have not been in contact with for over a decade. It has been so long, they are not even on my mailing list.

“We just cannot stop thinking about Pura Vida.”

They came 10 years ago and started their search for a retirement destination. Like happens so many times, life got in the way. They started making money, business was rolling, family got going, and time just flew by.

“Costa Rica was always our end game Mike. We just kind of got preoccupied. Well now, Mike, it is back on the top of our list. The moment flights open up again, we are there.” I signed them up for my newsletter of course. Never miss an opportunity. LOL.

I cannot begin to tell you how many people have told me “I am done with this rat race, and I am coming to Shangri-La. Expect me soon Mike. I am moving to Costa Rica.”

In all fairness, life is not perfect here. There is a tribe of goats that live in Playa Hermosa. They are adorable little dudes, until they come to visit YOUR flower bed. For the last year, these furry bastards would come to my RE/MAX Tres Amigos office about once a week, and have a picnic in our front yard. We have worked hard to create a beautiful entrance, and would have to shoo them away, whenever they would wander our way. Sometimes, I had to belt them with rocks, they are persistent SOBs. Well, with the office closed these past couple weeks, they had a fiesta; it was an all you can eat buffet feast. There is not one plant, leaf or flower that survived. When a friend of mine posted a photo of them, chomping away on my lilies, I went ballistic. For those of you that know me, you can probably imagine what I said about goats, and it got me banned from Facebook for a week; something about respecting everyone’s cultures; you know, the usual PC BS. Actually, it was a nice break, there is so much negativity and hate; it is scary.

All we can do is fight off the zombies one wave at a time. Do not stress about things you cannot control.

Costa Rica has continued to do an incredible job slowing down the curve.

People continuously ask me, why is Costa Rica doing so well? In my opinion it is simple. The majority of Costa Ricans are in great health. Remember we are a blue zone, where many people live to over 100 years. Ticos walk, have little stress, don’t smoke, and eat very well. They have incredibly strong immune systems, which is what you must have to beat any virus, whether it is this one, or the flu. You almost never see Costa Ricans sick; they hardly ever miss a day of work; and they are exceptionally clean.

Most important: They get their Vitamins every day.

Vitamin A from fish and dairy.

Vitamin C from fruits and vegetables.

Vitamin D from the sun.

We are winning the battle against coronavirus.

They are continuing their driving schedules and are keeping all the beaches, parks, gyms and churches closed.

The community has continued to come together with food drives, to help the locals who are struggling. Please open your hearts and your wallets and donate. Even a few dollars can make a big difference to a family with children. Ask your property manager to make a transfer on your behalf, or you can contact me and we can coordinate together.

Thank God for dogs: I need them now. 

Food for thought in hard times. This was translated from Spanish, and written by a Costa Rican.

Day by day, I am thankful for living in an underdeveloped country like Costa Rica; where after a couple weeks since the outbreak of the first case of coronavirus the schools of mechanical engineering  and physics at the University of Costa Rica have prototypes for ventilators they will produce; where the Clodomiro Picado Research Institute, thanks to many years of development and production of  antidotes for venomous snake bites,  is now conducting experimental trials with plasma from  patients who have already recovered; where the National Institute of Apprenticeships INA (a type of  trade school) is using its facilities to make robes, sheets, towels, and other hospital supplies; where in a matter of days one hospital has been retrofitted with cutting edge technology in order to  increase the number of hospital beds;  where a Costa Rican woman, living in Germany, invented an Application to make paperwork easier, so  that senior citizens can get help from the comfort of their homes; where the Costa Rican government chartered a plane to bring medical supplies all the way from China; where only three patients have died from this epidemic in the whole country; where nobody is denied medical care, even foreigners and tourists; where supermarkets make their products available for the most needy like senior citizens with special schedules; where health care workers, and law enforcement have sacrificed their vacations to help; and where our farmers work incessantly to fill the shelves of our  grocery stores and cupboards demonstrating that indeed we are self-sufficient.

We produce milk, rice, meat, vegetables, beans, fruit, cereal, fish and everything else we need.  Basic services are accessible to everyone. We even send medicine to the most needy by mail. Even without an army, our police force maintains order. Even in the most remote corners of our country small medical clinics (EBAIS) and schools can be found to serve the population. Today a number of infected people in the US, Spain, Italy, for example, cannot afford to purchase a test to see if they test positive for coronavirus. Today I ask myself, really, how UNDERDEVELOPED is our country versus those who say they are developed? Today I feel proud of my country and its people. 

ME TOO!!!!!!!

God Bless.

Hope to see you soon.

Come on down baby!

Join us.


P.S. Wear a mask INSIDE your house to stop you from over eating and becoming an alcoholic.
Please take care and stay safe.

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June 2021
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